Difficult people can ruin your day, your month, or even your career, if you let them. Someone who is difficult is excellent at creating situations that are frustrating and even a little bit scary. And depending on your personality and skillset, dealing with difficult people can feel terrifying, pointless, and impossible. Most people who behave this way are not rational or logical, which is why dealing with them can feel so infuriating. But you can use some proven and effective strategies to manage the situation and regulate your reaction to them, which is the only thing that you can control. 

How to Deal with Difficult People

Listen

Many times, the person who is upset or out of control is so because they feel as though others do not understand or are ignoring their needs. Listening, instead of responding or provoking them, gives them a chance to air their grievances, to tell you what the problem is, and to be heard. Just the act of “letting it out” can often calm them down and enable them to engage in a more productive conversation with you. Plus, by listening, you gain valuable insight into the situation that can help you deescalate. 

Remember What You Can Control

In any situation, it is essential to remember what you can and cannot control. You can’t control their actions, words, or emotions, but you can manage your own. You can regulate your emotional response, choose your words, and respond with kindness. If they are upset over something that is outside of your influence, you can’t control that either, so you should not accept the weight of their distress because it was not due to you. Focus on what you can control, and the whole situation will feel more manageable. 

Remain Calm

The calmer you are, the more likely the other person is to remain calm or to simmer down after their initial blowup. They will take their cue from your energy, and the longer you remain calm, the more likely the situation is to stay in control. And the more in control you are of yourself, the more they will be able to respect you and hear what you have to say. 

Find Common Ground

Building a rapport with the other person can be helpful, so start with what you have in common. Identify with their frustration or perception. Tell them how you have experienced something similar in the past. Ask them to help you resolve the conflict by working together. Explain what you can do for them and see if they have ideas for other ways to fix the problem that are within your control. Work together when possible to resolve the situation. 

Enlist the Help of Others

You may not know how to handle every tricky situation, so it is okay to ask for help or advice. When you are dealing with a difficult person, especially someone you see every day or work with, talking with colleagues, supervisors, and others about your situation may give you insight that you had not considered. They may have different perspectives because they see both of you differently than you see yourselves. Be sure to listen to what others have to say and to take this into consideration.

Admit When You Are Wrong

Sometimes, the other person is being difficult because you made a mistake or did something that affected them. When you are in the wrong, be sure to admit it and offer to atone for your error. Being the bigger person and admitting your mistake will go a long way toward diffusing the situation and rebuilding trust between you two for the future. 

​Many swear by the effectiveness of raising their self-esteem in establishing their independence. Have you been curious as to what this could do for you and how you could work to boost your self-esteem? Let us help! 

In this article, you’ll learn the following:

● How raising your self-esteem can help establish your independence
● How raising your self-esteem can help ensure you retain your independence
● How to raise your self-esteem - basic practices to get you started

Raising Self-Esteem Boosts Your Confidence
The major way that raising self-esteem can make you independent is by boosting your confidence. The more confident you are, the more independent you’re going to want to be. It will inspire you to not only insist on your independence but demand you get it.

As you boost your self-esteem and you become more confident, you’ll find that you have more of a command over your independence. 

Raising Self-Esteem Establishes What You Deserve
With higher self-esteem, you’ll find that you have a better understanding of what it is that you deserve. You’ll find yourself settling less and less and truly going after what it is you want in life. You won’t let others control you, treat you poorly, or take advantage you.

Understanding what it is you deserve in life will help you become more independent. You deserve to make your own decisions, live your life how you want to, and enjoy your independence. When you have higher self-esteem and a better understanding of what you deserve, you don’t settle for anything less.

Having Higher Self-Esteem and More Confidence Helps You Retain Your Independence
When you have higher self-esteem and the influx of confidence that comes along with that, you demand that you retain your independence. You don’t stand for people taking control over what you want, what you do, or any part of your life. You demand the independence you worked so hard to gain.

Working to raise your self-esteem helps to not only affirm your independence but also ensure that it doesn’t go anywhere, and no one infringes upon yours.

How to Raise Your Self-Esteem
Now that you know what raising your self-esteem can do for you, it’s time to put the work in to actually raise it. The following are great starter practices to turn into a routine that will boost your self-esteem in no time:
Affirming Your Worth
Throughout your day, give yourself a pep talk in the mirror. Tell yourself what you’re worth, who you are, and what you deserve. Remind yourself that you are strong, incredible, and valuable. You’re a unique person with great, unique things to offer this world; remind yourself that regularly.

Refusing to Settle
You deserve nothing but the best in life. You don’t deserve to be treated worse, have less, or be in any way lesser. You must absolutely refuse to settle for anything less than you deserve if you ever hope to affect a change in your self-esteem, confidence, and independence.

Sticking to Your Guns
You have to stick with these efforts and routines for a longer period of time if you ever hope to accomplish your goals in raising your self-esteem and claiming your independence once and for all. Don’t let yourself back-petal. Maintain the progress you’ve made and continue pushing forward.

Raising your self-esteem can most certainly help you boost your confidence, claim your independence, and retain it. Through the efforts made to improve your self-esteem, you will see a vast improvement in your quality of life and mental health. So, what are you waiting for? Get started today.

​Just like your physical health, your mental well-being needs a recharge from time to time. Taking care of your psychological wellness is an integral part of maintaining your overall health, so when you find your mindset and outlook is starting to feel down, it’s time to boost your mental wellness and get you back on track. 

Taking care of your mental health is not unlike looking after your body. You need to give your mind good things, healthy input, for it to remain strong and vibrant. Good things going in will result in positive thoughts coming out. Here are five ways that you can re-energize your mental health to help you rebalance your health and well-being. 

#1. Focus on Your Sleep Routine

Nothing affects your mental wellness more quickly and negatively as not getting enough sleep. Sleep plays a vital role in your ability to cope with stress, balance emotions, focus, process complex thoughts, make healthy choices, and remember. And the more sleep deprived you are, the less likely you are even to realize just how much it is affecting you. 

When you need a mental wellness boost, start with the basics. Are you getting at least seven hours of sleep at night? Do you feel rested when you wake each day? Make sure you are getting to bed at the same time each night, that your environment is conducive to sleep, and that you are stopping the use of electronics at least one hour before bedtime. 

#2. Spend Time with Others 

Interacting with other people is an essential part of maintaining mental and emotional health. When you are feeling down, it may feel natural to isolate yourself from others, but this can actually make you feel worse. Spend quality time with those you love. Go out with your best friend, spend time with your spouse, or visit with a family member. Your social support system is a vital part of your mental health, so be sure you are reaching out when you need some help. 

#3. Do Something for Someone Else

When you are feeling down or need a boost, try doing something kind or helpful for someone else. Whether you choose to volunteer in your community, help out a friend, or do a kind deed for a family member or stranger, helping others takes the focus away from yourself for some time and allows you to do something positive for others. Once you have accomplished your task, you will feel more positive yourself and able to better help yourself in positive ways. 

#4. Find Ways to Manage Your Stress

Stress is a very crucial factor that influences your mental wellness, so finding ways to reduce your stress or learn how to cope more effectively with it is vital. What we each find relaxing and stress-relieving is different, so what works for some people may not work for you. Explore your own strategies of stress management, but you may consider these popular choices as a starting point:
• Take a hot bath
• Go for a long walk
• Workout
• Do some yoga or Tai chi
• Meditate
• Write in your journal
• Talk with someone about what is bothering you

#5. Laugh

Sometimes, what your mental health really needs is a good laugh!! Laughter releases feel-good hormones and neurotransmitters that improve your outlook and help you feel more balanced. Find something that will make you laugh and indulge in it thoroughly. Watch a funny movie, go to a comedy show, spend time with friends you love, or do something that makes you feel young and carefree. Laughter is the best medicine!

Those who are interested in their personal growth are so for a variety of reasons. Perhaps you are at a crossroads in your life. Maybe you see that you need to expand your skills or thinking. Perhaps you are tired of the status quo. Or maybe you just love to learn and grow. Whatever the reason, personal growth is a path toward realizing your potential and accomplishing whatever it is you want in life. 

Personal growth is a journey, and while some would have you believe there is only “one way” to achieve this, the truth is there are lots of ways to develop and learn throughout your life, and some will be better at different times in your life. If you are curious to know which are most effective and most likely to help you improve yourself, we have compiled this list of effective strategies for personal growth. 

Be Mindful

One of the easiest ways that you can get in touch with what needs to improve or change in your life is to start paying attention to yourself and your present life. Mindfulness is a practice that allows you to focus and pay attention to your current life. It means that you pay full attention to yourself as well as to those with whom you share your life. Being mindful requires getting rid of the distractions that keep you from looking at your strengths as well as your weaknesses, and it gives you a path to improving your self-awareness, which is necessary for true growth. 

Pare it Down

Self-improvement is not about quantity but instead focuses on quality. If you were to list everything about yourself that you would like to change, improve, or enhance, it is probably a lengthy list. Rather than trying to do it all, focus on one or two things, and deeply engage in that work. This extends to other parts of your life, as well. Don’t multitask but instead do one thing at a time. Be engaged in whatever you are doing fully and presently. When you do one thing, you do it well, and you accomplish your goal. 

Reconsider Challenges and Setbacks

No matter what you are trying to accomplish in your life, you will experience setbacks, failures, and challenges. It is inevitable. One of the best things you can do for your personal growth is to learn from these obstacles and experiences rather than allowing them to deflate your sense of purpose or harm your self-confidence. Every opportunity in life is something from which you can learn. It is whether you can see and understand these lessons that show you are growing and learning or not. 

Figure Out Your Values and Needs

All the personal growth work in the world is not going to help you be happier or more successful if it is taking you in the wrong direction. Before you set out on a journey of personal development, spend some time clarifying your personal values and beliefs, and understanding exactly what you want from life. Knowing where you are going and what is important to you will ensure that your journey of growth is leaving you better off than before.

Remember Who Matters Most

When you are on a quest to improve yourself, it is necessary to disentangle yourself from what others think or believe. When you let go of a need to gain approval or not to disappoint other people, you free yourself to work on what is most important to you. Letting go of others’ expectations, judgments, and opinions allows you to set your own path and focus on what is important to you and you alone. 

​Conflict happens in most relationships, whether they are personal or professional. It is natural and reasonable, and it happens because we are complex creatures who are all different and have varying needs and opinions. Conflict is not just your initial disagreement but when you have attempted to get past this and can’t seem to come to a compromise or understanding. Because conflict happens frequently, learning to deal with it is an important life skill that everyone should learn to develop. Here are some effective strategies you can use to deal with conflicts of all kinds. 

Look Inward

Often, when we are in conflict with someone else, it usually stems from something within us that we are struggling with. When something bothers us about someone else, it can be because that same trait is bothersome in ourselves. Make a list of behaviors, attitudes, or values that often set you off in other people. Becoming aware of these is helpful. Then ask yourself how you embody these or what about them is more troublesome for you, and find ways to manage these within yourself, as well. 

Stay Calm

Once you accept that conflict is just something that sometimes happens, and not something you should take personally, it is easier to remain calm during a disagreement or confrontation with someone else. Start by talking in tones that indicate calm and agreement, as if you have already resolved the problem. Making eye contact makes it difficult for either party to stay angry or upset, too. Practice deep breathing to keep your own body calm throughout the situation. 

Ask Questions

Many times, conflicts arise because there is a misunderstanding or a lack of communication. Asking about the source of the conflict, asking the other person to clarify their understanding of the situation, and asking the other person about their intent can often diffuse situations before the escalate. Asking shows you are open and listening, which helps the other person feel heard, another critical ingredient in resolving conflict. 

Reconcile Expectations

Beyond problems with communication, a mismatch in expectations is the second-most common form of conflict. When one party has unmet expectations, it can lead to a wide range of feelings and reactions toward others. When dealing with conflict, clarify what each party had expected or needs, and start from this as a place for reconciliation. Often, just acknowledging your needs and agreeing to find ways to meet them can help resolve problems. 

Presume Positive Intentions from the Other Party

When trying to resolve conflict, progress will be hard if you do not believe that the other person is seeking a good outcome for you both. When you harbor resentment or question the other party’s objectives, you will never feel good about the outcome you find. Assume that the other person also wants a positive outcome and that they are entering into this without ill will or a hidden agenda. Doing this is much more likely to result in something positive for everyone. 

Acknowledge Differing Perspectives

We are all different, and we do not always see things to the same or have the same perspectives about the world and ourselves. All our past experiences color and inform how we interpret the world, and acknowledging that each of you comes to this situation with different perspectives can be helpful. Knowing that one of the reasons you have a conflict is that you are each seeing the same set of facts or circumstances differently helps to move away from “right” and “wrong” and accept that we all have biases and beliefs that influence our thinking. 

Final Thoughts

Dealing with conflict is not always easy or fun, but using these effective strategies can take the heartache and angst out of your confrontations and help you find ways to move forward together. 

Even with the best intentions, any plan can lead to failure. Many successful people have failed multiple times.  When a person does fail, they need to recover positively from the experience.

​The steps to recovering from failure include:

• Treating Yourself Kindly
• Accepting Mistakes
• Learning from the Experience

People often berate themselves more harshly for failure then they would another person.  Here again, the scientists at the University of California Berkley point out that treating yourself kindly after failure helps stop a person from fearing failure in the future. If a person makes the repercussions of failure too hard on themselves, they may develop a negative self-image or negative self-talk that causes them to fear the next challenge.

A person also needs to accept their mistakes when they fail.  Without admitting responsibility, they will repeat their mistakes over and over, limiting their success and developing a greater fear of failure each time they face a challenge.  Recovering from failure includes preparing for the next challenge by accepting mistakes and correcting them. If a person views failure as a learning experience, there is more to gain from failure and less to fear.  Educators teach students that failure isn’t the end of learning, instead, failure is the beginning of success.

Recovering from failure involves learning from the experience, so a person is better prepared to succeed when facing another challenge. Fear of failure is often fear of an unknown outcome. Learning from failure removes that fear because a person knows what does lead to failure and can make another choice instead.

Has your life felt a little too out of control? Maybe there are too many demands on your time and resources. People at work need something now, and your mother keeps calling asking when you’re going to come to visit next. Things are coming at you from all sides, and you desperately need a way out.
 
Believe it or not, the answer lies in something as simple as self-discipline. By taking charge of yourself, you likewise take charge of your life. Self-discipline means you’re making decisions that keep your feet on the path that you’ve chosen for yourself. And while the demands on your time might still be there, you can feel more in control.
 
Need some help getting started? Below you will find a list of some quick hacks that will set you on the road to freedom through self-discipline.
 
1. Pick a start date. Research has found that by setting a concrete date and putting it on your calendar, you have a higher chance of success. So chose the date and write “Freedom” in that space on your calendar.
 
2. Understand why you’re doing this. Create a list of reasons why you want to become more disciplined. Use that list to create affirmations and then use those often to keep yourself motivated.
 
3. Use creative visualization. Imagine yourself with self-discipline. How does that life look? How does it feel? By seeing your self-disciplined life in your mind’s eye, your brain believes it is possible.
 
4. Deal with temptation. If what you’re trying to use self-discipline to correct (like eating better) involves tangible objects, then remove those items. For example, get rid of the junk food in your cabinets, because they will become a temptation. If it’s an intangible for example, a person you can’t say no to, then write a script of how you’d like that particular conversation to go. That way you already have the words to say no when you need them.
 
5. Grab a snack. Willpower goes out the window when your blood sugar is low. Ask any person with diabetes about a time when they crashed, and you’ll find out just how much low blood sugar affects brain processes. Even for people who do not have diabetes, low blood sugar can have a serious effect on your ability to carry through with your plans. A quick carb-loaded snack or even a small piece of candy might be just what you need to get back on track.
 
6. Hang out with the cool crowd. By surrounding yourself with self-disciplined people, you create for yourself a support group as you set forth on your journey. Sometimes all it takes is someone to mentor you through the rough spots.
 
Don’t kid yourself, becoming self-disciplined is hard work. But you can make it a lot easier for yourself if you set yourself up for success from the start. Remember who you’re doing this for (you!), and you’ve already won half the battle.